My name is Van Brown, I'm 44 years old and from Alabama. I contracted Guillian Barre' Syndrome in September 2000 (one week before my 42nd Birthday).

My story begins in the gym on a Friday afternoon. I walked 3 miles at lunch and returned to the gym after work for my afternoon gym time. At 41, I was healthier than I'd been in years. I cared for elderly family members for years and following my Grandmother's passing, and a bout with a ruptured disk, swore it was my time and I'd make the most of it. I looked and felt better about myself than I had ever felt.

The night before my onset I was very restless and couldn't sleep, come to think of this the entire week before the onset, my sleeplessness became more and more. I'd traveled Labor Day weekend, and like my companions, gotten a sinus infection. My ENT prescribed antibiotics and a steroid the previous Monday and of course, the seasonal allergy shot.

While lifting weights I became very fatigued and headed home early, as I really felt some oncoming weakness. The trip home was very strange and my driving skills became increasingly poor. As the evening progressed, my hands become numb and I had a rough time in the shower raising them above my chest. I'm not much of a drinker and always had numbness after a glass of wine, so, at first, I laughed it off. My housemate returned home at 10:30pm and I told him something strange was happening to me. Throughout the night my trips to the bathroom became abnormally frequent and my inability to walk increased.

The following day, I seemed to be a little better and thought this weakness just a reaction to medications. At the advice of some physician buddies, I stopped taking any medications. Walking became more difficult and eating/holding a cup became almost impossible. The following morning I could no longer bathe myself or walk without help. I panicked as I knew the medications should be weakening after 10 hours. I was admitted to a local emergency room and within an hour, informed I had the beginning symptoms of Guillian Barre'.

The emergency room physician listened and questioned me on every statement. He didn't have much bedside manners and without much concern informed me what he thought I had and what I should expect to happen. I wouldn't trade him for the friendliest doc in town today. A neurologist was called in and before a definite diagnosis could be made using the spinal tap, she started the treatments of plasma drips which would last for 5 days.

The longest 6 days of my life were spent in that Critical Care unit. I saw first hand the helplessness my family must have experienced during their illnesses and my only comfort was that they never feared that they would be taken care of. Thanks to some very quick thinking doctors for starting treatment so quickly and a healthy body, I was only paralyzed for 5 days.

The 3 months of outpatient therapy that followed are somewhat of a blur. I was transported to a rehab hospital a week later and spent a while there. I learned to walk with a walker, dress and feed myself, and the hardest thing of all, look in a mirror to view what had been a healthy 41 year old who became a very old 42 overnight.
I returned to work one week before Christmas. I made it for the planned trip to Ft Lauderdale for New Year but as a different person.

I've left a lot of baggage behind now and I live for today and not tomorrow. As of June, my doc says I've made a complete recovery, well physically anyway. Recovery has been ongoing for the last 3 years. I'm 95% well today.
I've never been a very competitive person. I attribute my nearly complete recovery to my physical condition at the time of the onset and to a quick thinking emergency room doctor who had a very good prognosis within the first hour in the hospital emergency room. As fate would have it, he contacted a Neurologist who was also quick thinking, she began the treatments even before complete testing was done as I entered the hospital on Sunday and most tests couldn't be run until the following day. She was also 9 months pregnant. I remember praying the baby wouldn't come before she got me through my week in intensive care!

I do realize just how very fortunate I've been as I read testimonials from others recovering from GBS. My illness can't compare in length to many of you, but the trauma has been just as great. I remember so clearly struggling with using my fingers, awakening of my toes, the Frankenstien walk,and the terrible depression which outlasted the physical aspect of the illness.

I've learned how quickly your health can be taken from you. Physical healing can be seen by the eyes but emotional healing is long felt by the heart. My life has been forever changed. I still catch myself watching my feet move in amazement or practice my finger exercises I learned as a little boy and relearned as an adult to help in coordination. I know there's always the possibility of return and each day that goes by, I wake up and say a little prayer when my feet touch the floor. To each of you who are healing, have healed, or trying to resolve the emotional issues that come with this illness, my prayers are with you. There is healing in time.

Looking back, I never realized just how sick I was. Sometimes I think the brain allows us to filter emotions and helps us not deal with issues in order to act as a buffer. As a caretaker for 3 elderly relatives during my younger years, my most dreaded fear was such an ordeal as being paralyzed. Those same fears allowed me to take comfort and learn to let go of control. I would be most grateful if relaying my experiences with someone would assist in their recovery.

If I could share one thing which attributed to my success in recovery, it would be that I was told early in my recovery stage that I should actively work hard in rehabilitation as I would make the most significant recovery within the first 3 months. The physician in charge of rehab felt that after that time recovery would be more difficult, and that very likely after 3 months I'd probably have to live with weaknesses. I'm not sure if that is truly the case as I've been recovering for 3 years, but I do know it provided me with much determination. I'm currently working out 6 days a week, and you'd never know I had such an unusual disheartening illness.

Thanks for the opportunity to tell my story, Sharon.
Van Brown, GBS 09/00
06.2003